Nu Alpha Omega by H. Claire Taylor

Author:H. Claire Taylor [Taylor, H. Claire]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Tags: Fiction, Humor, Satire
Published: 2017-03-21T04:00:00+00:00

Messing around with boys in vehicles was nothing new to Jessica, but it was usually a larger vehicle, one where she could shift her weight from one knee to the other without getting a steering wheel or stick shift right in a soft spot.

But Priuses, it turned out, were not designed for messing around.

There was something about all this that didn’t sit right with her. First of all, she wasn’t sure why she was making out with Quentin, letting him manhandle her like this. Sure, he was a good friend, and they’d made out before, but she’d never wanted to date him. And then there were a couple other problematic parts about this; namely, Chris and Miranda. But somehow she’d forgotten that Miranda and Quentin were dating until she was already tangled up with Quentin, and while she felt guilt about Chris, she remembered, just as Quentin grabbed a handful of her ass, that they had broken up. Or more accurately, she’d ended it in their argument outside the dining hall, after he’d called Jimmy down from Midland or up from the depths of Hell or whatever.

But she still wasn’t completely into it. She should just stop. There was no point.

“Before you give up on the idea all together,” a man’s muffled voice shouted from just outside the car, “a word?”

For the first time ever, Jessica didn’t mind her half-brother’s interruption.

She turned to Quentin. “Rain check?”

He nodded vaguely, his mouth lolling open slightly as he stared at Jesus. “Is that who I think it is?”

“Only if you think it’s Jesus,” Jess said, rolling down the window.

“I always imagined him as black.”

That got her attention. “Really? Black?”

Quentin nodded. “Yeah. I mean, what’d you imagine him to be?”

Jessica shrugged. “I guess I expected him to be white.”

“Race is a manmade construction,” Jesus interrupted casually. “And I prefer ‘brown,’ just so you know. But it doesn’t really matter in Heaven; we all just kind of glow and wobble.” He waved it off. “That’s not why I’m here.”

“Okay, why are you here?”

“The same reason I usually visit you. It’s time to stop messing around and focus.”

Jessica rolled her eyes. “On what? Please don’t say I have to use my miracles anymore.”

Jesus nodded like duh. “Of course you do. And you need to keep discovering them. If you don’t get out of your little bubble, you’ll never find them.”

“But the last time I got out of my little bubble, I woke up in a cow pasture.”

Jesus pinched the bridge of his nose. “You know, it’s really not one or the other. You can get out of your bubble without acting like a lunatic. I mean literally, a lunatic. I believe you were howling at the moon at one point that night.”

“It sounds like you’re judging me.”

“Because that’s exactly what I’m doing. It’s part of the job.”

“Miracle Management?”

Jesus sighed. “Kind of. I mean, I have a new title.” He couldn’t meet her eyes.

She chuckled. “You got demoted.”

“Nooo. You think you’re so smart. The job was combined with another job, so I have a new title.

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